So I have decided to log a few of the things I always want my girls to remember things I want them to always take with them wherever they go;
- Always put the butter on before the marmite or jam, I know but come on, it makes sense.
- Never tuck your jumper into you trousers, no matter what you Nan might tell you, it is not cool or useful.
- That blank expression your father has on his face is normal, I promise he is neither upset or in a mood, I have checked a gazillion times.
- Milk does not make you grow a beard, I was lying.
- Always wipe from front to back and please stop using the expression ‘shake the lettuce dry’ It is not an acceptable way to dry after weeing.
- Never shave your monobrow, always pluck, daddy is really good at it, he’s like a hairy beautician.
- Mister maker is not frightening.
- Flying Susan is not really a flying doll, it was simply a game taken to the extreme.
- Picking your nose will not make your bum fall off but if you must do it, stop doing it when we go out.
- Not all meat is Nannies meat, however unless it was you would not eat it.
- Not every biscuit contains nuts, I was lying.
- They are called peanuts not penisnuts. I know, crazy.
- There is no such thing as a guttersnipe.
- Haggis are not animals that come out the ground.
Well girls for now that is all you need to know, I’m sure the future will bring more, take these facts with you wherever you go!